21/10/8

Morning journal,
I try to sleep but there are nightmares when i try.
Now more than ever i don't know what i'll end up doing.
Hell i dont even know which foot will be placed on the ground
when i walk. I can't make a plan, no, i can't, those who make plans
get failure, disapointment... and i don't need anymore. Believe im me journal.

yeah that was my first entry of the day, wanna sing with me?

I'm sorry, yes I am, for everything that I've done.
How can I do this right, without you in my life.
Even though I say I love you I've gotta make a change in my life, baby,
I realize that you're better off without me by your side.
You're a special lady and I know I'm not ready for you, oh

i sing that part alot now. Those who makes plans are better off,
but like mi tia tells me for safe measures, she always tells me
to take each day at atime. she dosent want me back at ccmc for depression.
When i ODed she wasnt sure if i was okay, she thought it was badd. It was when i did, it was horrid. i was throwing up everything, i had one of the worst headaches and i didnt sleep for three days. i wish i would have gone to the hospital but i handled it at home. Stupid mistake. after when i told nancy that i was still fucked up they took me to look at me. thats who i once was. im loved blog, you know that?
well im gonna rest my head, most likely will take a nap. Awake and dreaming, bryan